My little brother is celebrating his second anniversary in our great Nation's Capital (or as our parents' refer to it, the fast-paced city-life he's chosen over settling down and giving them grandchildren.)
The following twenty items are nuggets of wisdom he's collected over the past two years of Washington, D.C. residency:
20. Happy Hour is kind of a big deal
18. The weather is nice for about 3 weeks in October
16. "I'm from DC" "Oh really, where?" "Bethesda"
15. Everyone has a friend who works for the CIA, who doesn't actually work for the CIA
14. Karaoke here is full of nepotism
13. Everyone is hiring, just not you
12. People name drop like elsewhere, but it's way more esoteric: "So I was talking to the Deputy Secretary of Commerce Bruce H. Andrews and he loved my Tariff Proposal"
11. Taxation without representation
10. The Non-Profit industry surprisingly employees thousands of people
9. Food desserts
8. Never cross the Anacostia
7. In terms of travel, Virginia might as well be the moon
6. Brunch makes Sunday morning Binge Drinking feel responsible
5. "$1,300/month for a converted sunroom? That's an amazing deal!"
4. I can look up your salary. And I will
3. DC Metro, "Expect delays in all directions due to single tracking"
2. Rush hour is every hour
1. Everyone has a fictitious, but completely reasonable sounding explanation on building height restrictions
20. Happy Hour is kind of a big deal
19. Non-stop construction, business growth, and corruption
18. The weather is nice for about 3 weeks in October
17. People love complaining about how long their commute is. Monday morning is like a contest on who drives the farthest
16. "I'm from DC" "Oh really, where?" "Bethesda"
15. Everyone has a friend who works for the CIA, who doesn't actually work for the CIA
14. Karaoke here is full of nepotism
13. Everyone is hiring, just not you
12. People name drop like elsewhere, but it's way more esoteric: "So I was talking to the Deputy Secretary of Commerce Bruce H. Andrews and he loved my Tariff Proposal"
11. Taxation without representation
10. The Non-Profit industry surprisingly employees thousands of people
9. Food desserts
8. Never cross the Anacostia
7. In terms of travel, Virginia might as well be the moon
6. Brunch makes Sunday morning Binge Drinking feel responsible
5. "$1,300/month for a converted sunroom? That's an amazing deal!"
4. I can look up your salary. And I will
3. DC Metro, "Expect delays in all directions due to single tracking"
2. Rush hour is every hour
1. Everyone has a fictitious, but completely reasonable sounding explanation on building height restrictions
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