What if Michael Stipe was onto something?
Typically my study of the bible involves skimming the water-to-wine story while waiting for the scotch to kick in, but following my recent diagnosis of multiple sclerosis, it was time to flip to the back of this thousand-page paperweight and see how the story ends.
Revelations won't be seen on the New York Times Bestsellers Book List. Compared to the rest of the New Testament, it's a real downer. A lot fewer McFish sandwich miracles, a lot more multi-headed beasts.
Typically my study of the bible involves skimming the water-to-wine story while waiting for the scotch to kick in, but following my recent diagnosis of multiple sclerosis, it was time to flip to the back of this thousand-page paperweight and see how the story ends.
Revelations won't be seen on the New York Times Bestsellers Book List. Compared to the rest of the New Testament, it's a real downer. A lot fewer McFish sandwich miracles, a lot more multi-headed beasts.
Much of Revelations reads like an exaggerated bar story. Like the Apostles were hanging out one night and John had a little too much tirosh. "Wait, wait guys so I was sayin' this beast has these five - no seven - seven heads! An' ten horns, like at least ten horns!"
Thomas is rolling his eyes and Matthew is pissed off because he always ends up being the DD, "Goddammit John, that beast has more heads every time you tell the story. What's up, you said you could hang!"
Now personally, I find it a little inconsistent that after twenty-six books featuring the sort of easy-going, son-giving, non-vengeful God you feel like you could have a real future with...he decides to smite the shit out of us after all.
Talk about a misleading Match profile:
 |
seeking women 25-39
within 20 miles of the Mountain of Zion
Have kids: Yes, they sometimes live at home (1)
Faith: Spiritual but not religious
Interests: Loving mankind, forgiving their sins
Drink: Social Drinker
No comments:
Post a Comment